What Keeps Me Up At Night -> The Silence!

Last year, I embarked on a leadership program my company offers. It's like being chosen for the A-Team of office leadership, and they bring in trainers from across the country to lead the initial week and then leadership from within my company. It's a 3-week course stretched over 6 months, and at the end, you and your group must present on a topic you're assigned at the end of the first week. No pressure, right?

When introducing ourselves, the leadership group asked us (all 40 of us), "What keeps you up at night?" My baby was a mere 6 months old at the time, so I said, "My 6-month-old baby." Talk about a missed opportunity for a punchline! If you haven't guessed, humor is my love language for my family and this rollercoaster of life.

The more I thought about it, I realized it wasn't just the baby keeping me up; it was also the SILENCE. Any parent will tell you that when the house is quiet, they can take a deep breath. They can ditch the parenting hat and just be themselves for maybe an hour, but oh, what a blissful hour it is.

I've done a multitude of things with my one hour of silence. I've exercised, devoured more cereal than socially acceptable, watched TV, read books, tackled the NYT crossword puzzle, and scribbled down my Mom thoughts. My husband, the workaholic, is glued to his laptop or phone, considering it "quality time" even if we're in separate universes but sitting on the same couch at the same time. That's a debate for another day!

This hour of silence is precious. It's mythical. It's like a unicorn—rare and magical. But beware, it's misleading (the baby does wake up several times a week to cry, and we've had to comfort him because self-soothing is apparently not his thing).

Occasionally, I've dedicated this hour to crafting the perfect grocery list, because who doesn't need a strategic plan for aisle navigation? I've also embarked on epic quests for clothing bargains, as if I'm Indiana Jones searching for the Holy Grail of discounts. I've even dared to face the fearsome beast known as work email. There are moments when I've stayed up way past this hour, savoring the sweet, sweet silence like it's the last slice of pizza. And let's be real, I know that once I close my eyes, morning will sneak up on me faster than a cat on a laser pointer, and the whole circus will start all over again.

Every day, I strive to make that hour count for myself. SELF-CARE is crucial! Even taking a shower without little eyes staring and tapping on the glass like it's a fish tank is a glorious way to spend some of that hour.

And being in your 40s means your nighttime face routine takes a bit longer. Enter anti-wrinkle creams. Then there's the foot and heel cream (I'm turning into my beloved grandma!). I'm even slathering lotion on my elbows. I've entered the realm of no return—coat everything with creams so wrinkles get suffocated in the process.

So, I put my hour of silence to good use. I've told moms, and they've told me—you have to take care of yourself. You can't take care of everyone else if you burn out. And burn out is a real threat for many of us moms.

Take that hour. It's precious. Devote it to whatever makes you happy.

--Amber